Recently I've gotten a lot of in person comments from people about my YouTube videos. It has meant a lot to know that people have actually taken the time to watch them and have even found them enjoyable to watch! I was truly unsure of where they might take me or how I would be received. Surprisingly, I've been really learning a lot about myself over the last few months. Putting myself out there has really helped me gain some clarity on life.
The things I want in life are constantly changing or evolving. Since I made that first video, I have begun to realize that I've been settling for other people's expectations for me. It is too easy to worry about how you will be perceived by others if you follow your passion, especially if it means turning your back on the more secure pathway to "success". We have a ridiculous idea of success if you ask me. Of course the term means something different for all people. However, generally we feel success is a nice day job, money, marriage, family, etc. Please don't get me wrong, those things are wonderful for many people. However, they have become the standard "life formula" which people are expected to follow. Am I saying I don't want some of those things eventually? Absolutely not! But I also want something more.
I have turned my back on passion many times only to regret it later. I've replayed those decisions over and over, trying to picture what could have been if I had only chosen what was actually in my heart- not what I thought someone else's expectation of me was. I've taken jobs I loathed and studied courses that made me miserable. I worked tirelessly over each task I was given. Why? I knew I wasn't passionate about those things, yet I continued to do them because I was afraid of letting the other people around me down.
I've been thinking about this topic for months now. While mulling it all over, I've been trying to make sense of how people are able to take what they love and morph it into their own realities. I have heard of people loving what they do so much that their jobs don't feel like work. How often do people really feel this way though? I believe that wonderful things can be born out of our imaginations. But I also believe that we silence our imaginations so we can chase down the lives we think we're supposed to be living.
My goal is to stop planning my moves based on what is in some unwritten "How to Live" rule book. Making every attempt to abandon this damaging thought process has helped me more easily clarify what I want out of life. Yesterday someone asked me,
"if time and money were no object, what would you do?"
That was all I needed to hear to understand that I haven't been honest with myself. Of course this doesn't mean I'm going to stop working and am just going to lay in bed and watch Netflix for days (because honestly, I've considered that too), but I am going make a point to regularly check in with myself to see whether or not the things I am choosing are aligned with my personal goals so I can create a better life for myself.
I would love to hear from you!
If you had to answer the above question, what would your answer be?
Also, what do you have control over in your own life that could enable you move closer to that dream life?
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